Love is all around this time of the year. A romantic dinner, a starry night, a dance under the moonlight…we probably sound like a movie cliché. Now let’s get realistic. The perfect night with the perfect person is not going to happen by itself. Your magic midnight kiss and second date expectations depend on a solid and special first date. Now, it’s okay to be nervous about your first date; you don’t know what to expect or know how the night will unfold (unless it’s someone you already know, which could save you a lot of trouble). Don’t get me wrong—nerves are good! They keep you sane, and they, of course, keep you excited. This person has already asked you out or you asked them out, whatever it may be. You are already halfway through; the rest is pure instinct.
Firs Things’s First: Your Closet
Yes, for some of us this is a big thing (although it shouldn’t be—you’re perfect in anything). If you are indecisive, you will probably change a hundred times and go out with the first outfit you tried on. If you know exactly what you want, then perfect! Just remember in both cases that you have to feel comfortable with whatever you are wearing, because people can tell when you’re uncomfortable. You want to show the real you at all times. In the end, you are the one who has to be impressed. Your date already likes you if this night is even happening, so you have nothing to worry about. (Blind dates do not apply. In that case: beware of catfishing situations).
Food is the easiest way to go. Normally, first dates develop at restaurants or coffee shops. Having food in the middle makes the conversation flow easier for some reason. Maybe it’s because people bond over pizza—who knows? It gives you an excuse to think about your answers and think about his questions when you have a bite in your mouth. However, food has a dark side. Its name? Sauces.
Even though sauces are great too, if you are having a burger, it’s not so cute when your mouth, let alone your bomb outfit, is covered with ketchup. Accidents tend to happen, so just to be safe try to avoid sauces. This is just a first date concern (or maybe 2nd and 3rd), because after a while, who cares? He or she is obligated to love all of you, even with sauce catastrophes.
What’s okay to say right now? What’s best left for later? There are people that really enjoy talking about themselves and will literally tell you their whole life in a matter of minutes. There are exceptions, always, but most of the time talking about yourself too much can be a little too soon for first dates. Leave a little mystery. It’s not likely that your date will enjoy a detailed list of all your exes and the reason why they didn’t work out—it’s a little weird. It’s better that you leave the ex file closed. Although you may find it strange if you’re out of practice, you should let your date speak, ask him/her questions, learn about his/her life, etc. There are millions of personalities out there. There are a million ways the conversation could go. But if you tend to be silent and not talkative at all, or you encounter someone like that, try to find common subjects and go from there. When in doubt, use a generic conversation starter as an icebreaker.
There are some other little things you have to account for, such as eye contact. First dates are all about connections, and eyes are the window of your soul. As cheesy as that sounds, it’s a perfect way to connect and engage with what that person is saying. Other things like good breath and a good bath before the date should be on your mind—please!
It’s not a science. You just have to be yourself. At the end of the day, that’s all that matters. If it doesn’t go past the first date, then it was not meant for you. It’s as simple as that: take everything in stride. These are a few tips that can help you make the most of the date, whatever and where ever it may be. And just remember, most of us will probably be watching TV at home (which is okay too), so you’re already ahead of the game. But a date with Netflix is a tale for another time. For now, rock your date and please don’t brag when you’re no longer single and ready to mingle.
Photo by: Emily Berger